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To
avoid
hitting
the
bumper
of
the
car
in
front,
I
struck
the
pedestrian.
An
invisible
car
came
out
of
nowhere,
struck
my
car,
and
vanished. I
was
on
my
way
to
the
doctor
with
rear
end
trouble
when
my
universal
joint
gave
way,
causing
me
to
have
an
accident.
The
guy
was
all
over
the
road.
I
had
to
swerve
a
number
of
times
before
I
hit
him. In
my
attempt
to
kill
a
fly,
I
drove
into
a
telephone
pole.
I
had
been
shopping
for
plants
all
day
and
was
on
my
way
home.
As
I
reached
an
intersection,
a
hedge
sprang
up
obscuring
my
vision
and
I
did
not
see
the
other
car.
I
had
collided
with
a
stationary
truck
coming
the
other
way. I
had
been
driving
for
forty
years
when
I
fell
asleep
at
the
wheel
and
had
the
accident.
As
I
approached
the
intersection,
a
sign
suddenly
appeared
in
a
place
where
no
stop
sign
had
ever
appeared
before. I
was
unable
to
stop
in
time
to
avoid
the
accident.
I
was
thrown
from
my
car
as
it
left
the
road.
I
was
later
found
in
the
ditch
by
some
cows.
Coming
home
I
drove
into
the
wrong
house
and
collided
with a
tree
I
didn't
have.
The
telephone
pole
was
approaching. I
was
attempting
to
swerve
out
of
its
way
when
it
struck
the
front
end.
The
other
car
collided
with
mine
without
giving
warning
of
its
intentions.
The
truck
backed
through
my
windshield
into
my
wife's
face.
I
thought
my
window
was
down,
but
I
found
out
it
was
up
when
I
put
my
head
through
it.
The
pedestrian
hit
me
and
went
under
my
car.
The
pedestrian
had
no
idea
which
way
to
run,
so
I
ran
over
him.
I
pulled
away
from
the
side
of
the
road,
glanced
at
my
mother-in-law,
and
headed
over the
embankment.
I
was
sure
the
old
fellow
would
never
make
it
to
the
other
side
of
the
road
when
I
struck
him.
I
saw
a
slow-moving,
sad-faced
old
gentleman
as
he
bounced
off
the
roof
of
my
car.
- Author/Source
Unknown
-
Now
I
know
what
they
mean
by
defensive
driving!
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"Animated Dancing
Pages" |
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"Three Little Fishies" |
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"YMCA" |
If you have the time, stop by my home on the web, have a cup of coffee,
and see a list of my other web pages. Please sign my Guestbook so I know
you've stopped by.
Thanks!
~ StinaLisa ~
"Wipe
Out"
Surfaris - 1961
The music playing is a condensed version of
"Wipe Out", and is for entertainment, educational and evaluation purposes only. Titles have full copyright by their respective artists and record companies. Please show your support for the artists who gave us this great music by purchasing their CDs.
If you are interested in purchasing a full version of "Wipe Out" by
The Surfaris, I have provided a link below to Amazon.com. They sell both new and used CDs. I have purchased many used CDs for my web pages and have never had a problem.
Amazon also sells MP3 downloads in several categories with single songs ranging from 89 to 99 cents.
Thank you.
I've also included a link to
Richard Lederer's book Anguished English: An Anthology of Accidental Assaults
Upon Our Language. It is a funny anthology of accidental assaults upon
our language, and includes the above quotations reported on insurance claim
forms. I'm sure you'll enjoy the book.
*************************************************
September
1999
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